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subscribeGrammar Police, part X
posted: 03.12.09 at 09:30 PM
filed under: grammar police
The Grammar Police have issued an All Points Bulletin for the elusive “User s.”
Source: Instructions for television antenna from Radio Shack.
Grammar Police, part IX
posted: 03.01.09 at 10:45 PM
filed under: grammar police
Dr. Pepper feels vindicated.
Source: Hot dog stand in Waukegan, Illinois.
Grammar Police, part VIII
posted: 02.22.09 at 08:00 PM
filed under: grammar police
“I haven’t seen my name misspelled like that since medical school,” Dr. Pepper remarked.
Source: Jewels in Waukegan, Illinois.
Grammar Police, part VII
posted: 02.15.09 at 04:03 AM
filed under: grammar police
Incorrect use of plural forms is normally a misdemeanor offense. Charges for the owner of this sign were upgraded to a felony in light of the fact that the erroneous sign had been on display for over a year.
Source: Auto repair shop in Chicago.
Grammar Police, part VI
posted: 02.08.09 at 08:00 PM
filed under: grammar police
‘I’ Am! Hungry
Source: Bar in Chicago.
Grammar Police, part V
posted: 01.28.09 at 09:30 PM
filed under: grammar police
Confusing the words “you’re” and “your” is a felony offense. Thanks to the Grammar Police, charges have been filed against the owner of this sign.
Source: Hot dog stand in Chicago.
Grammar Police, part IV
posted: 01.21.09 at 08:00 PM
filed under: grammar police
Spelling errors also fall within the jurisdiction of the Grammar Police. Errors on mass-produced signs are particularly embarrassing. Eventually, they got it right.
Source: Laundromat in Chicago.
(Reader submission. Thank you, Colleen.)
Grammar Police, part III
posted: 01.05.09 at 09:00 PM
filed under: grammar police
I know what their intent was, but when your sign reads “RE’SUME’S,” you have entered the jurisdiction of the Grammar Police. Put your hands on the wall and spread ‘em.
Source: Storefront in Chicago.
(Reader submission. Thank you, Whorey Povich.)
Grammar Police, part II
posted: 12.28.08 at 09:00 PM
filed under: grammar police
Vegetables served to the tune of “Chopping Broccoli."
Source: Restaurant menu in Waukegan, Illinois.
Introducing the Grammar Police
posted: 12.20.08 at 09:57 PM
filed under: grammar police
You know what really grinds my gears? Poor grammar.
My beef is not limited to grammar; poor use of the English language simply pisses me off. While certain shortcuts are annoying but acceptable in casual communication, linguistic indiscretions are completely inappropriate in business communication.
Any time I read a sign that proclaims “SHOE’S, BUY TWO PAIRS, GET ONE FREE,” or an email warning that “Someone left they’re key’s in the conference room,” a little part of me dies.
If grammatical errors while speaking are a minor folly, the same errors in printed media should be considered a Cardinal sin. The permanence of the printed word can give an error a lasting legacy of ridicule. Some egregious offenses are even made famous by comedy hack Jay Leno’s “headlines” segment on The Tonight Show.
There is a duality in my emotions to poor grammar. While I scorn those who make the errors, mocking the errors gives me a perverse sense of delight.
Fortunately, there is no shortage of material to mock. There is a plentiful bounty of hand-lettered signs and cheesy junk mail circulars that were written at a third-grade level.
Without further ado, I am happy to present the first entry in this column.
The sign actually refers to the Sioux Indian Chief named “Barefeet”. He wrote several bad checks a few months back.
Source: Liquor store in Waukegan, Illinois.
